This blog post is a lot about my prep for 2019, and some ideas perhaps on how you can incorporate numerology, tarot, and goals into your new years planning. I am by no means an expert on numerology, and most of my knowledge about it is intuitive and related to tarot.

About a year ago, I discovered this blog post from Spiral Sea Tarot that described the basics of how the numerology of each year can inform not only collective energy, but our personal experience. It was at this point I discovered that 2018 was my numerological year 1, the start of another nine year cycle. (If you want to calculate your year number, that link will help!)

I decided it was important to me that, for my first year of another cycle, I needed to have some goals or resolutions. On a whim, and without much structure, I sat with myself and figured out a few goals I wanted to manifest in my life that year. I hung them on my wall, and returned to them every once in a while. I didn't keep good track, or maintain any structure to my progress, but nonetheless it helped me feel productive with my growth throughout the year.

2019 is my personal year 2, which shares an energy with the High Priestess, the second major arcana card. Two energy is all about balance, union, and duality. I think about the twos in the minor arcana: the careful justice of the swords, the fruitful dreaming of the cups, the balancing act of the coins, and the expansion of the wands. Twos are where we meet ourselves, whether in the contemplation of the Priestess's temple, or in the mirror of another being. It is the light of the sun reflecting off the moon.

Going into 2019, I wanted to build off of the practice of goal making. I have created a solid list of goals for 2019, and I am planning on tracking developments with them through journaling throughout the year. I even printed out this little graphic to hang on the wall and keep in my phone case to remind myself always of what I am working on!

1. RESPECT MY BOUNDARIES:

A lot of 2018 involved the testing of what I thought were solid boundaries. I thought my standards were higher, that I was putting myself first, and in many ways I was proved wrong. This year I want to pay special attention to what feels right and healthy to me, and I want to be honoring those truths first and foremost.

2. HONOR EXISTENCE:

This one is sort of vague, but for good reason. Lately I have been recognizing the power of thought and speech. I found that annoyance or disgust with others' behavior (however harmful or bad it might be objectively) was effecting my outlook. So this intention is to recognize even the unpleasant things and experiences in life, and honor them. They are there for a reason, and so however I might feel, they belong in some way. Even if it is just to remind me how grateful I am that my experiences or actions are so different.

3. LISTEN TO MY BODY:

This one is a little more straight forward. I need to listen to my body. When I am tired, I need to rest. When I am hungry, I must eat. Beyond that, if I am feeling habitually unwell, I need to change how I treat this vessel. This also includes exploring meditation and other body/mind experiences. Also, just recognizing sensations I have. Soreness, adrenaline, thirst, contentment, etc. etc. etc. How can I be present if I myself do not even know how I am feeling?

4. NOURISH RECIPROCITY:

The High Priestess smiles on this one. There is not give without take, or take without give. I cannot give all of myself to everyone and never receive. I cannot take and take without giving. Normally I find myself in an overly giving position, without even knowing how I got there. But I am not exempt from finding myself in the taking position as well. The goal is to course correct before these extremes come about. By asking when I need, and helping when I can, I sustain a reciprocal ecosystem with those around me.

5. SEND LOVE TO ALL:

This is pretty connected to number 2, but more about keeping my spirits up. I found I have been building an island of myself because I am beginning to expect others will be cruel or unable to understand me. I have in many ways retreated from vulnerable interactions with other people because of fear. Sometimes, in the moment, it won't be safe for me to be open or interactive with someone who is opposed to my beliefs/against my very existence as a trans/queer person, but from afar, I can still send love to them. I can want well for them without wanting to reward them or excuse their behavior. I want for all people the awakening and acceptance they need to find their right paths. I want love for all people. It is not one or the other. I can protect myself and reject the hatred others may have, and also send them love. In fact, I think these things may go hand in hand.

This isn't a "fight hate with love" type of passive "allyship" thing. I mean this mostly for my own health. Harboring negative feelings can mutilate my trust in people and my willingness to share and engage. I believe it is important for me to start combating my generalized fear by just simply sending loving and kind thoughts without judgment or consideration.

6. CREATE FOR MYSELF:

I have created A LOT this year, but nearly none of it was for myself completely. A lot was for my tarot platforms, a lot was for school or my other work. But my personal sketchbook has been the same all year, and isn't even completely filled. As someone who used to never leave the house without a sketch pad, who drew all day every day, this frightened me a little. The reality is I need to set aside time to let my creative energy flow, and never seek approval or validation for it. I need to make some art for me, and me only.

7. TRUST MY MAGIC:

I have build a lot of great magical experience this year. TROE, tarot journaling, candle work, intuitive drawings, etc. etc. Most excitingly, I finally stepped into my title as witch, and accepted magic as having a prominent role in my life and my work. This year I want to begin diving deep into what feels most right with my magic. How does it manifest. No shame, no fear, just exploration. I am not silly, or confused, or even alone (that's a big one). I trust myself, and the magic I make.

In addition to all this, I have done some tarot related work, and joined it with my knowledge of numerology, to create a "theme" for the year! The collective year number for 2019 is 3, which is related to the Empress. So the year has a lot of potential for collective growth and manifestation. As I stated before, this year is my personal year 2 (High Priestess), which alludes to a lot of reflection, consideration, duality, and cooperation. I conducted a little divination on what other things to consider for 2019, and got this:

I drew STRENGTH for this year, which makes a total of three majors to think about for 2019! The High Priestess, The Empress, and Strength are all feminine associated cards, all within the first 9 major arcana, and I have associations between them and major deities in my practice.

Another interesting draw was LOVE from the Prism Oracle. Love, and the color it is associated with (pink) plays into 2019. My first thought was love like the collective love I aim for in my goals, but it is not lost on me the many ways this could enter my life. Through friendships, family, or romantic unions, and hopefully through community as well! I will be keeping a special eye out for pink as a symbol now...

If you are planning on writing up any resolutions/goals, I would love to hear about them! If you have drawn any cards, or have any thoughts on your own numerology, I would love to hear about that too! Whatever you do or don't do in prep for 2019, I hope you have a fantastic end of the year. And I hope that in some way, this may inspire you to stare 2019 on the right foot.

Blessings and best wishes!

2019 - Numerology, Tarot, and Goals for a New Year